Mojave


2015  R 1:33 blu-ray  Mark Wahlberg, Gerrit Headlund, Louise Bourgoin, Oscar issac

A taught thriller set in the Mojave desert while an artist seeks existential meaning he ends up in a cat and mousse game with a serial killer.

I didn’t have to write many notes or couldn’t think of anything to write about it so it’s not actually inspiring,at least not for me..

Now days later, I don’t remember it except one cool looking dark stormy shot (which I am trying to do a chalk pastel of~)

 

F

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Don’t Breathe


2016     R    Stephen Lang, Jane Levy, Dylan Minnette,Daniel ZovattoImage result for Recycled Trash Art

 

Three thieves from Detroit  break into the houses of the rich to make a living.  They get word  of an old blind vet  living in an abandoned neighborhood who won a settlement  following the death of his only child. They break in  thinking it’s an easy target but find themselves trapped inside fighting for their lives and also find a shocking discovery inside their supposedly helpless victims basement.

Easy and simple… an hour has gone by and I am wondering why this was not a direct to video release.

Kill Your Friends


2016   Not Rated  Nicolas Holt  1:43

 

Netflix’s description

“Without a pop act to keep him afloat, A&R agent Steven Stelfox is slowly sinking beneath the waves of the recording industry. Refusing to drown , Seven adopts a radical and deadly approach to getting ahead in the music business.

So I waited for an hour before writing anything as really there was nothing to write about.. it’s not worth the time unless you are secluded in a cabin with snow half way up your door!

There Is a bit of that dark Brit humor here and there but mainly it’s a bore, even when Nicolas Holt breaks the fourth wall to talk to the watcher as he explains the music industry. (nothing I didn’t know already)

They sign what would make money but not based on actual talent!!!

 

F

X-men Apocalypse


The usual suspects Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Nicolas Holt, Even Peters,James McAvoy, Sophie Turner with McGuyver’s Lucas Till (was he in the past ones?)

I don’t have much to say about this, other than we find out how  Charles Xavier becomes bald.

The plotline stinks, why does it seem centered on Mistique to me? Wasn’t crazy about Angel though glad he now has the sharpened wings. And s a few days later I can’t remember much (nothing that matters) about it.

It’s set in the 80s and starts in Ancient Egypt during a transfiguration Ritual (why not just call Professor McGonagal?)

Some ‘Gods’ or shall I say priests with the masks of their gods as well as soldiers around are protecting the body.

One of these soldiers who is supposed to protect what is going on is in on a plan against the ritual, and upon attacking gets folded up into a ball.

Later Charles Xavier’s school is burning down and Quicksilver goes to save everyone, one being a french bulldog which love the face like it’s in a car and its jsut not letting go of that slice of pizza!

Amusing the movie makes fun of it self!! saying the 3rd one always sucks and honestly.. I’m VERY glad I didn’t waste my money on it seeing it in the theater! I waited for cable!  Definitely a poor (below poor?) outing.

and EssexCorp. What is the Essex corp? I never heard of that before or don’t remember .

Honestly I’m not crazy about this set of X-men films… I like the originals better, but then I do need to rewatch those for a Class Cuts installment

Nine Lives


2016   PG   Blu-ray  1:27  Comedy  Jennifer Gardner, Robbie Amell, Kevin Spacey     (IMDB)

Mr. Brand is a worlaholic CEO of the ‘Fire Brand’ on the night of his daughter’s birthday (party) he buys a cat for her and ends up falling off a roof with the cat and he ends up in the cat’s body somehow, while his body is in a coma.

What is with all the cats by three? It’s like 3 of the same cat or 3 cats together…

Oh my the blue of that cat’s eyes! And The part where it’s drunk had my family cracking up!

I can see why Entertainment Gave this a worse of 2016 movies; The pacing is too slow, not sure about the characters in general, there’s so many ways this could have been at least a good if not great movie. The only good parts is when the cat is on screen.

 

“Oh look Satan’s over for dinner’ (in reference to his ex-wife.)

Oh yeah and then at one point the mother mentions (I forget if it was Amell’s character or the daughter) had asked “Why is daddy a vampire”

There’s a part where the cat Mr. Fuzzy pants  (gosh if I were a cat and someone cave me that name I’d rip your face up’ I jsut hate those stupid cliche pet names.) looks like he’s i a donkey Kong game  When he’s walking up a wall or something.

 

Those security guards deserved that!!! (You know what I mean when you see it) and there’s Lil Bub!!!

I won’t kill the movie completely, but it deserves at least a D for some of the jokes. They could have made it better if it were an hour long special!

 

Want it? Order the DVD or Bku-ray via Amazon or on Amazon Video

 

 

Hellraiser: Hellseeker


Image result for Hellraiser: Hellseeker

2002  R  1:29  Dean Winters, Ashley LaurenceDoug Bradley (as Pinhead)

Trevor is suffering from terrifying hallucinations  after losing his wife and memory in a car crash. These vision threaten the man’s grip on reality.

This is more a mystery than horror in my point of view. I’d say the more memories that come back to him, the more crazy he gets yet still doesn’t remember. Plus he has to deal with being a suspect, as his wife’s body was not found in the car after the crash. There are times I think that the audience isn’t supposed to be able  to tell if its ‘reality’ or an hallucination.

I miss the days seeing the criminals and those who messed with the puzzle box were turned into cenobites. I  always wondered why they were called that and not just demons, because frankly they are that. Plus the fact Hellraiser is the series, so wouldn’t Pinhead as the lead cenobite really be the devil incarnate and the others just his demons?)

Another reason why I wonder they were called that is because cenobite, sounds more like a kilobite megabite etc. maybe ceno = Century bite, either that or some sort of robotic parasite.

We get flashes in his halucinations of some of the cenobites  but they are not really satisfying for the longtime fans of the series. I remember in one of them identical twins cops were made into a twisted conjoined twins.  Will Trevor be turned in to a cenobite, some sort of guppy maybe?  These later installments make me sad as they are not made as well as they once were I just beg hollywood, PLEASE if there is any remake/reboot of the franchise DO NOT LET Rob Zombie have anything to do with it.

D

Watch on Amazon video or order your DVD/Blu-ray here

Open Season: Scared Silly


2016  PG   1:25  Blu-Ray

 

In this sequel Boog (the bear) is afraid of some werewolf Campfire story. Elliot the half wit deer decides to help him face his fears so they can go on their annual camping trip.

Together Boog’s woodland friends help scare the fear out 0of him while solving the mystery of the ‘Wailing Wampus Werewolf’

There’s not much to really say about it there were a few good laughs and the psychotic Lava coaster was cool but I found it lacking quite a bit, in story and plenty of other things. As it is a PG movie it’s also made in part for adult’s to enjoy  sadly I think this one is more for kids. The only thing I remember about it is the werewolf which to me belonged in one of the new scooby cartoons.