Extraordinary Tales


2015  Not Rated  1:13   Narrated by  Christopher Lee, Bela Lugosi, Julian Sands, Guillermo del Toro, Cornelia Funke, Stephen Hugues, and Roger Corman

 

On opening it looks like Burtonesque origami! Turns out it’s tales from Edgar Allen Poe (no wonder I ordered it!)

A Crow flies on screen with the statue and as it later says ad I quote

 

“What am I doing reciting poetry with a statue…I must be drunk”

 

my cat is watching the crow oops or being as this is Edgar Allen Poe… I should say Raven on the screen intently!

Each story seems to be animated in a different style which I like, as it would also help with the tone of the story.

 

  • The fall of the house of Usher you certainly cannot mistake the voice of Christopher Lee.
  • The Tell Tale Heart- this one narrated by Dracula’s Bela Lugosi and there’s definitely no mistaking his voice either. This in was done in the noir (or something like) style. Now this is the way I wouldn’t mind a story being told to me. If tupac and Michael jackson can be resurrected via hologram I know there are programs that can work with a voice clip to fix or dub over dialog mistakes in movies (at least now) … any chance we can get this to be done for some stories on audible? THEN I might be willing to pay the extra bit to have a story told to me.
  • The facts int he case of M. valdemar  is narrated byJulian Sands and done in the style of an old comic strip style it reminds me of the colors and such of  the Prince Valient comic strips. And My word one of the characters look like it was inspired by Vincent Price, (or very similar) I would swear it WAS VP if it weren’t an animation.
  • The Pit and the Pendulum    voiced by Guillermo del Toro  is done in a style like some of the video games. Now a lot of the time video game graphics are so good that when I first (or firstfew times) I see it I think its a trailer for a movie and the people are real then at some point during the tailer or after seeing it 3-5 times it clicks its a video game.   Its done in a realistic way yet not.
  • The mask of the Red Death  this looks like it was done with water color or chalk but aside from the art I didn’t care for this one at all. I don’t know if it was the narration or the story itself, or maybe it was the style it was animated in (or the effect of all of it overall)

 

Can kids watch it… that’s for you to decide though after reading the stories, I would definitely (if I was a teacher) have my students watch this.

Kung Fu panda 3


2016    PG  1:35  blu-ray  animated action adventure Jack Black, Bryan Cranston Angelina Jolie Jackie Chan

Full cast on IMDB

Po having been reunited with his long lost father  sets off for the secret Panda village.

Shi Fu graduates Po to teach his fellow warriors. Master uguay is attacked in the spirit world after 500 years by Kai who was his partner and collects the Chi of the masters and threatens all of China.

Li Shen (father) shows up beating pos dumpling record then the old masters through Kai attack. Po needs to learn  how to use his chi to beat Kai and quickly teach his fellow panda Kung Fu.

The Dragon warrior is truely awakened

SKADOOSH!

Available through Amazon Video

Ice Age Collision Course


2016  PG   Via HBO

Snow Skrat, Ice skrat and Skrat’s fortress of solitude??  no we have Space Skrat!~

We open on the mammoth’s father and daughter playing a game of hockey (yea!!!) peaches is all grown up with a boyfriend and ready to marry; of course when you’re happy and the universe knows it it has to drop a steaming pile of poo on you. Here you almost expect to hear ‘the sky is falling but instead we get smarts from a (pirate ?) weasel who is on the lam from some dino birds who like to steal eggs.

I forget how many of these have been made now (previous to this one)  but I do remember a few of them were disappointments, and made me think they weren’t going to do them any more.  This one however was not. I think they got the magic back they had from the original movie. Making a mental note to check out who the writer (or writers) were for each of the movies.

The possums or whatever those are supposed to be gave me a laugh with their cheerleading  especially their Hashtag  “What’s a Hashtag”

I don’t know but it sounds cool

I’m already sick of it

 

 

Sausage Party


2016   hard R   adults only animated comedy  1:29  Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill,Danny McBride, Selma Hayek, Ed Norton,

  Did you ever wonder when you were a kid, or baked what goes on when the supermarket is closed? Or maybe we just can’t see?

Of course the oldest frat house has, and it comes in the form of an animated hard R comedy

The grocery food and products are actually alive and believe in what they call the beyond (our world).  After watching the movie I read the Entertainment weekly review of it  and wanted to share a quote of it with you as they put the description of ‘the beyond’ ever so ‘eloquently’…

“beyond” is in fact  an abattoir, a masticating horror show of death and dismemberment perpetuated by the greedy, heedless mouths of monstrously hungry human gods.

The hot dogs are a bunch of horn dogs, The unbeknownst dorky store manager is played by the charming Paul Rudd.

Stephen hawking is gum, there’s Sgt pepper which I got a chuckle when I saw as I thought of the Beatles and apparently candy is the best food to fight with.

Then there’s the literal douche played by Nick Kroll, you know the loud obnoxious guy at the bar that’s always too drunk, breath stinks (maybe even body) and is a sexist pig? Yeah that guy is this fem hygiene product in a nutshell.

1:19 or 1:20 not real what called a cartoon

Had a few mildly funny moments and yet its another stoner frat party (need to come up with some frat name for Rogan and Friends) Not sure the age of them guys but even I don’t act nearly as immature even tho I’m told to act my age

I guess this would be funnier if you are stoned though I’d imagine if I were high in anyway I would freak the F out!

Watch on or rent from Amazon   read more on  More on IMDB

Finding Dory


2016  PG  1:37 adventure, Animated    Blu-ray  Ellen DeGeneres,Albert Brooks, Ed O’Neil,  Ty Burrell, Diane Keaton, Eugene Levy, Sigourney Weaver  IMDB info

Oh my Dory must be short for adorable cause look at her as a baby!

He parents notice early on she has a short term memory as well as being easily distracted but they taught her well.  In this adventure we travel the sea to find her parents who she thinks is in a sea world type aquatic rescue place.

With the help of friends along the way and yes we get to hang out with Nemo and his Dad Marlin again. She finds out where she originally came from and that her parents aren’t her only family.

I think you could say even when you can’t see him the octopus is a bit of a scene stealer! (which watch the beginning of the credits as it works as a find the octopus.

The last half and even better last quarter of the movie is best part of the whole.

The octopus driving was a hoot

Watch or buy through Amazon

The Secret Life of Pets


I’m so pissed! They changed the Song the Poodle listens to in the trailer from that Thrash metal to no idea what the hell that is now, but it’s not funny like it was.

2016   PG    Blu-ray  1;30  Animated, Comedy

Louis C.K. Eric Stonestreet, Kevin Hart, Albert brooks, Dana Carvey, Jenny Slate, Ellie Kemper, Lake Bell,Hannibal Buress

 

Happy Terrir Max ‘s world is upended when his owner brings home the large bear of a dog and a ‘mongrel’, Duke  home.

The 2 find themselves allied against a mass of abandoned pets who want to turn the tables on the humans.

Gidget is a poof of a dog, more like a talking cotton ball! Chloe is a snooty fat cat, Peppe a Chihuahua and Mel I guess is a bull dog (which I later found out was actually a pug).

As I mentioned in the beginning of this about the trailer being changed,  I guess that was sort of a test or something.  Still LOVE the headbanger poodle, still cracked me up while watching the movie! Maybe I found it funny as that’s my choice of music but the movie or 2 I saw in theaters that had it in the previews the rest of the audience had a laugh too so I guess it wasn’t just me. (I guess it’s funny because it’s a prissy poodle plus goes from that classical musical to metal let alone THRASH metal!)

Now we get to the Psycho bunny which is either where Happy Bunny came from or the idea for it was taken from the “Cute But Psycho…Things even out  Happy Bunny stickers  (and the knock off version)

It’s enjoyable for the whole family especially if you are pet owners and I’d advise to SKIP NINE LIVES as this is a much better story.

The colors are so bright and vivid as though you;d never seen before.

“It’s poo poo with a dash of caca”

Sausage palace Grease + Willy Wonka

‘Great You’re in  love, How gross for everyone’..

-Mmm that sounds more like Grumpy cat but I think it was the Bunny.

 

Find some quotes and goodies here

IMDB info

watch or purchase via amazon

Pop’s Party Tips

 

Some sort of Game pieces

 

Angry Birds


PG  97 minutes  Animated/Family

Danny McBride, Bill Hader, Sean Penn, josh Gad, Jason Sudeikis,Kate McKinnon,Maya Rudolph, Peter Dinklage,Keegan-Michael Key

I would guess this is  what events predated the game… Why are the birds so angry? Red is in Anger Management and when he’s finally almost ‘cured’ The Bad Piggies take over Birdland and steal their eggs.

I feel indifferent about this, it’s probably more enjoyable for the kids.  I think the story could have been written better, but for a bare bones base of adapting from a game they did do a decent job. Maybe it would have been more fun to have seen in 3-D in the theater than at home on blu-ray? There’s meta jokes and moral lessons for both parents and the next generation of Pork puns and there’s Bird curses of  FLOCK you!  (and I thought I was cheesey saying Fudge and Fork you and other made up ways around Kids and my elders)

 

“I thought you stored your nuts for the winter”

-King Pig

 

IMDB  *    Order Angry Birds for any format here

I think someone forgot to count them before they hatched!