xXx: Return of Xander Cage


2017  PG-13  blu-ray  1:47 Vin Diesel, Samuel L. Jackson, Nina Dobrev, Donnie Yen, Toni Collette

                                         Kris Wu  Ruby Rose  Deepika Padukone

I like the opening ‘space’ scene and the bit in the Chinese restaurant with Gibbons trying to recruit some guy (at the end of the movie shows he’s some soccer star) but showed a ‘stats’ card that said he thought he was being recruited by the Avengers.

Now there’s a cool stunt.. ‘flipping off bullets’ onto a bike might beat Winter Soldier’s grabbing the bike out from under the rider..  but I’m not really sure on that. I’ll go with a tie. Now wait… skiing …without snow… in a forest…I mean I know they ‘snowboard’ on sand dunes but with all the rocks etc that would be in a forest would that even work? I’m going to just chalk this one up to Hollywood imagery.

Now THIS was freaking cool he goes from BMX dirt bike to a …errr… SKI Bike!!! or do we call it a surf bike WTF should that be called! but whatever I’d LOVE to try it!

Oh Forget Xander can we get a spin-off of the Green haired sniper?  (for some reason she reminds me of that 90s Aeon Flux cartoon)

What should be the meaty part of the movie, with not only story with a minor and a major stunt and action work …ends up a disappointment.

Just as said… gridlocked traffic (lol) ok so maybe they saved some budget that would have been used for at least a fight in act 2, for Xander going fast and furious!  Ugh the corny ass chick pose shooting, really I thought we were past that  Charlies Angels crap!!! (where’s the feminists bitching about that?!!?!?!)

‘The Mouth Problem’  (not gonna ruin that) and we get a surprise I didn’t expect to show! WOW for once something in an action movie is actually kept on the DL  although I do say they do show too many stunts etc in the trailers, and with this one not having as much as I remember in the original (though I could be wrong.. I haven’t re-watched that in years)

I will say one way the original is better than this one… the sound track! The original one had a 2 -in-one a disk for the rockers and one for the hip hop/rap fans. 

I can’t even find an actual soundtrack.. just ‘Music from the motion picture’ which from reading the titles is actually the score (being it’s not music made by different artists and bands)

I thought it was going to be total crap like certain other reboots that have happened but it wasn’t too bad, I might even consider putting it in my library with the original

C

 

 

 

IMDB   *    buy your preferred format here via AMazon

 

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Ready Player One Database


IN case I forgot to include the books   anoraksinvitation.online/

Anoraks Almanac

Games
Movies/Tv
Music
 Miscellany
Info/notes
LEGEND    ^=Cartoon  *=Saturday morning  ‘cartoon’    += text adventure game   @=RPG   
Akalabeth
Superfriends ^
Police
Peter Jackson
Director
Joust  (1982)
Wargames
Journey
Terry Gilliam
Dig Dug
Real Genius
R.E.M
James Cameron
Dodge
Tron
The Clash
Stanley Kubrick
Raaka-tu +
Riptide #
(music & comic)
Might Be Giants
Steven Spielberg
Bedlam +
E.T.
Devo
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Pyramid +
Greatest American Hero
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Yar’s revenge
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(TOS, TNG, D59,
Voyager, Enterprise)
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Gobots *
In your eyes- Peter Gabriel
Howard Jones
80s poet
Star Master
Transformers *
Bill Hicks
Comedian
Adventure
Land of the Lost *
not a cartoon
E.T.
Thundar the Barbarian *
Douglas Adams
Author
Pitfall
Schoolhouse Rock*
Stephen King
Gurps   @
He-man
Kurt Vonnegut
Champions  @
G.I. Joe *
Neil Stephenson
Car Wars   @
H.R. Pufnstuf *
(not a cartoon)
Battlezone
G-force*
Orson Scotcard
Spacewar 1962
Go Speed Racer Go*
Richard Morgan
Tennis for 2 (1958)
Star Blazers
Midnight Oil
(87 hit beds are burning
Terry Pratchett
Zork +
Godzilla*
Forget ref. to
Robotrohn 2084
The Space Giants
(or Maguma Taishi  in Japan)
‘Rockin like Dokken
Terry Brooks
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The Holy Trilogies
Crystal Skull and on ‘don’t exist’
Defender
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Donkey Kong
Matrix
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Voltron*
 Halderman
astrosmash
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 ^Dungeons &Dragons  80s
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ikari Warriors
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Madness & the Minotaur +
BattleStar Galactica
3 is a magic number- Bob Dorough
Scalzi
Black Tiger
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Zalazny
Time Pilot
Howard the Duck
)
Oscilloscope
Dungeons of Daggeroth  ‘82
Cowboy Bebop
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TRS-80
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Sword Quest (series) 1982
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A million Miles away The limsouls 1983
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TRS-80 III
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Basic
Programming language
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Atari 800XL
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neon genesis evangelion ^
Song  by bunckner  & Garcia
Atari 2600
Excalibur (John Bormann)
Fruit loops
Cereal
Explorers             (Joe Dante)
Honey Combs
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Quisp
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Robots
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Tranzor Z
Isis
The Iron Giant
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Leopardon
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Minerva X
Silver Spoons
Buck Rodgers

Alice Through the Looking Glass


2016  PG 1:53   Johnny Depp, ‘Borat’,

Alice returns from a seven year sea voyage and passes through the magical vortex where she journeys  into the past to save the mad hatter . So why is she at sea, let alone captaining a ship? in the 1800s a woman would likely not have been aloud as captain let alone on a ship as they were considered bad luck for ship and crew.

 

I LOVE how colorful and bright her kimono type outfit it. But then again it is mostly purple  with green trim  and the spattering of other color on the shoulders, then the dress green with gold…she looks like a walking Mardi Gras party.

 

Man does Johnny Depp look like Elija Wood and Carrot top had a kid! (SCARRY!)

The White queen apparently has taken hand flair lessons. (Way too much and exaggerated)

In the movie there’s I’ll say ‘robots’ Seconds that turn into minutes which protect time… They remind me of the Mixels from the shorts on Cartoon Network (or is it Boomarang) station.

its fun when it starts but a decline however we find out the history of how the Queen of hearts head got so big.

Kung Fu panda 3


2016    PG  1:35  blu-ray  animated action adventure Jack Black, Bryan Cranston Angelina Jolie Jackie Chan

Full cast on IMDB

Po having been reunited with his long lost father  sets off for the secret Panda village.

Shi Fu graduates Po to teach his fellow warriors. Master uguay is attacked in the spirit world after 500 years by Kai who was his partner and collects the Chi of the masters and threatens all of China.

Li Shen (father) shows up beating pos dumpling record then the old masters through Kai attack. Po needs to learn  how to use his chi to beat Kai and quickly teach his fellow panda Kung Fu.

The Dragon warrior is truely awakened

SKADOOSH!

Available through Amazon Video

Kong Skull island


2017   PG-13  Action,aDventure, Fantasy

Tom Hiddleston, John Goodman Samuel L. Jackson Toby Kebbell  Brie Larson John C. Riley Shea Whigham,Corey Hawkins

In the March 10th issue of Entertainment weekly measured up the many incarnations of King Kong strating with the
1933 Merian C. Cooper and Ernest B. Schoedeck’s original, in which the ape’s size fluctuates depending on the scene. So how does Kong measure up in 2017?  read on to find out!

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King Arthur : Legend of the Sword


This poster doesn’t look as nice online as it did in the theater’s holder. Unless maybe the one int he theater was without the jacket

2017   PG-13  2 hr 6min  Charlie Hunnam, Jude Law, Eric Bana,Astrid Bergès-FrisbeyDjimon Hounsou,Tom Wu,Kingsley Ben-AdirAidan Gillen

Director Guy Ritchie

imdb info 

Planned to be at least a 3 movie series to tell the story of King Arthur, I recently read on the movies IMDB page in the trivia section, that there are a planned 5 more installments.

For years man and madge lived in peace then Mordred  and his giant elephants broke the peace marching on the towns the last being Camelot. Arthur is a young boy who witnesses  his father Uther’s (Eric Bana) sacrifice to save him against his Uncle Mortigan.  The Young Arthur is found in a boat by 3 ladies doing laundry, who raise him in their brothel and growing up learning use his wits and fists  on the streets of London growing up into the face of Charlie Hunnam who is a haunted and cocky man (but then he can back up that cockyness)

Jude Law plays Arthur’s uncle Mortigan (is it just me or are there too many characters in the Arthur legends with Mor- in the name? (Mortigan, Mordredm, Morgana etc.) So Mortigan, oops sorry to me it sounded like an M but nope IMDB has it as VORTIGAN as you will know if you know anything of the Arthur stories is the pain in the butt, to put it nicely and may be turned into an Excalibur kabob!  There’s one part in the movie I’d even call him Hitler! (I think you will know what part I mean when you see it.)

The Black Legs (I think is what Mortigan’s guards are called) have metal masks that remind me of some metal bands mascot, not sure if it’s iron maiden Nope its the Quiet Riot mask! 

The Thump of the war drum brought a chill over me and I’d swear my heart fell into the Rhythm of it.

CAMEO ALERT! but i won’t ruin it I’ll just let ya know it’s during the part where the guys are trying to pill the sword from the stone. I almost didn’t realize who it was.

The humor in it is a bit different, not a laugh out loud hilarious sort, though it may get a few snorts outta ya. Much is wise-assery and shut the F* up who’s on first sounding type. Of course its the dry English humor but  with a little more to it. For instance one line I actually did laugh out loud the actor who plays Goose Fat (aka Little Finger on Game of thrones…) takes a ring off and Arthur says “Leave the ring on Honey-tits”

Oh so that’s a new twist I think (at least to me) on why or how the sword got in the stone. (Well I have one of the books here to read so I wonder if this is creative license or if it was in the some of the legends)

I’m not sure why but at in the trailers I like the “Doesn’t it make the palace burn well” line, I’m not sure why I think its more Hunnam’s voice and/or accent as seeing it in context, it falls lame.

Wait WHY does Excalibur look like it has wood grain, when it’s metal???

The fight scenes were cool though I could have done without the all the digital crap in them. The stop motion etc. But ignoring the ‘artsy’ part of the fights I enjoyed the action. Also aside from the horses are any of the animals actually live not CGI? Speaking of the animals Talk about River Rats and  sewer rats the size of dogs! (I think this would eat a Rottweiler!) I’m the one that usually makes fun of the people who jump on a chair when they see a mouse… These I think you would need a tree!  but you might find the big cat up there cause I think these could make one its bitch!  And then there’s the ::screams like a girl::: snake not the giant one, but the moment with the small one (No amount of money would have gotten me to let them do that! I don’t care if it isn’t poisonous!)

Oh and if the separated at birth picture on my tribute page for him doesn’t prove that… In the movie he uses the sword at one point and I had to shake my head… I didn’t know if I was watching Season 1 of Vikings or the movie. The way he moved with the sword reminded me of Travis Fimmel’s Ragnar did.

I don’t think there was a boring moment and I enjoyed watching the movie, as if I were watching a Marvel movie!!

It’s just a shame that it came out in May! Of course anything other than a Marvel movie being released in May  (or as I’ve been calling it MAyVEL) would likely flop. So with that, You know I’m saying it was a flop at the box office with an estimated  175,000,000 cost (which I think 1/2 to 75% went to the difital FX) and I think in the states only made 40 something mill back. However I always say, the Box office tells you NOTHING! Just what was most popular, not actually good. I don’t know How a movie get scheduled for release but I could assure you if I had any choice.. I would choose any month nothing is released from Marvel or certain Franchises (basically if I know what’s going to be out If it comes out the beginning of the month at most I would choose the last weekend for my movie to come out)

On IMDB it has a rating for it of 7.4 out of 10  so that’;s the equivalent of a B and Entertainment Weekly gave it a C+

in which their review not only helped with how I wanted to describe the word play (as I couldn’t think of how best to capture it) and some of the babble but   mentioning the “Best moments are the smaller ones_ the scheming and snap-crackle -pop wordplay among its gallery of medieval rogues.  Sadly they make it sound really bad when they say it’s the same franchise quicksand the director stepped into with his Sherlock Holmes reboot (the first one was fine the 2nd one on the other hand was garbage to me) because the ‘mental gymnastics were upstaged by the razzle dazzle and with this he’s just sinking deeper.  When Arthur pulls the sword the reluctant hero is born the film sparks to life  with Arthur’s grifting, wisecracking  Cockney cronies with colorful names like Goosefat bill)

Phony looking special effects sequences of marauding elehants and magical eel creatures. They mention it could have been a rollicking blast if not for those which make it a wannabe blockbuster but has too much flash and not enough soul. But as I said ignoring the digital FX (or at least once I noticed there was going to be an annoying amount) I though I don’t remember sitting back in my seat I ‘sat back’ and relaxed and enjoyed the film.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Uther Pendragon IS the stone)

 

 

Great Wall


2017  PG-13 action adventure fantasy  Matt Damon, Tian Jing, Willem  Dafoe, Pedro Pascal

For a movie called the great wall, I found a lack of posters without it in it. It’s mostly just the actors with the text(maybe a small fore-image or background image of the wall.  If there are any (They are from China and those countries, a few I’ve seen but they are more art than an image from the movie.)

So I was sea-sawing on the decision to see this. I got an email from Showcase cinemas that if you had a star pass and bought a ticket for the movie, you get a FREE!!! Popcorn AND! drink!!! made the decision for me! My dad wanted to see it as well so we went and had ‘daddy daughter’ time.  For a sort of last minute decision, we quite enjoyed it.

The movie is about one of the legends of the Great Wall, as well as the army that protects it. a couple of mercenaries in search of black powder (gun powder)  end up attacked by some creature and are able to kill it. They end up helping the colorful army defend the wall against some monstrous creatures.

The army is a color coded menagerie of  warriors. Red archers,  Yellow foot soldiers and my favorite the Blue Crane corps, amde up of all women who ‘fly’. They are like a fighting Cirque du Soleil.

They have been in preparation for the return of some creatures, I forget… were they called tregarts? (or was that something from harry potter?)

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