Avengers: Endgame

 

2019         RUNTIME:   3 hours         STARS: (I would hope you’d know this by now)

I’m sure I sound like a broken record by now. I always wonder how am I supposed to write a review of a movie without spoiling it for others, . (especially being the trailers do enough of that in my opinion). Besides, there will be plenty of others writing their reviews that will Likely    somehow ruin something for you.  I swear its like Fight club, 1st rule …don’t talk about fight club however you just feel a gun to your head when it comes to Marvel’s. 

1 thing  I CAN tell you before we start Is there is no official mid and Post credit SCENE (hint hint). Now because I was told this, I didn’t stay for the whole credits. I later find out there MIGHT be a subtle clue. (That article is in the Spoiler section)

Its been a week (or more) since it came out and I mulled things over. I do hope after holding back a week, that its fair game and write my review without ruining anything.

For an 11am showing it was a packed theater. I even saw one of the viewing rooms started at 7 something am!!!! WHAT!!!

Were schools off for Eater or spring break? If not there were a lot of kids playing hookey. I heard it made was it 60 million over opening weekend or was it 6 billion. (6 billion might include international, though I heard it off-hand)  Avengers: Endgame Breaks International Box Office Records

They had a Thanos Dance video sadly I can’t find it but I did find one of the Dancing Thanos https://imgur.com/M6s5YbG  Dancing thanos had the entire theater tickled Hysterical! Sadly being I don’t have that clip for you, hopefully you haven’t seen this. Then I’ll get on with my actual review…

 

So how does one talk about Marvel’s Fight Club. Thankfully the spoiler ban is lifted but still I will try NOT to fully ruin everything, otherwise any thing that I think might be one will be under the spoiler line (and likely will have to highlight to see)

Some rumored theories I’ve heard were more or less on point, and to me I think may have some what ruined at least my expectations of those parts.

Those horrid looking robot suits (and I’ve seen one of toys with it and I think they might be worse on the toys but they look too toy like for my taste. And NO its not because we are not used to seeing them in one Uniform, these things are awful. Maybe if they would have used the white as a trim and used red and blue in the rest of it or just all black. They look like some sort of armor and sports equipment in one. Thank goodness they are a temporary necessity.

We open on Hawkeye’s ranch and for those that are Hawkeye fans… I think this movie makes up for the previous movies where he didn’t have much to do so they should all be happy.

Overall I’d say the movie meets and maybe even exceeds expectations. Unlike Infinity War when we have a low point not long later its lifted with a joke (apparently that did not help the person I read a headline that went to the hospital for uncontrollable sobbing)  I’d expect it from one specific point in Infinity war.. the part where it felt like your heart was ripped out and all the air in the theater sucked out. We had still pretty much just met the new spider man so I didn’t really have any emotional ties. But maybe it was because he was a kid not sure but THAT part should hae gotten  Tom Holland some awards!  There’s only 2 things maybe 3 in this I think might have done that, one being the ending. I nearly wanted to cry.

When Tony is leaving the message on what I presume is his beaten mask from Infinity War I swear it looks like Ultron. He is stuck in space drifting but he’s not alone as the trailer seemed to portray, he’s with Nebula.

Now I have a joke noted but not sure if I want to mention it though I almost missed it. Tony sees rocket and says “For a second, I thought you were a build a bear”

OH SH** I think I just had a heart attack… Cap says Son of a Bitch!!!! I have to say after the beginning of Ultron picking on him about not cursing, I was flabbergasted hearing that! Or maybe thought I was hearing things!!

Wait, did Thanos look like that at the end of Infinity war?   Ah not long later we get an explanation why he looks like his face looks like a bottle rocket blew up in it.

ooo- k that must have been a lab rat at one time as it seems to know hits way around the Quantum machine controls in Scott’s impounded van. Who seems to be and rightfully more confused than Hawkeye whose hair cut I absolute love.

Those suits! Sorry its not because we don’t see the Avengers in all the same uniform, those things are just so UGLY and AWFUL and I think I’ve seen one of the toys which has them.. and not sure which looks worse.  Instead of mostly white they should have been trimmed in white. They just look like Motocross bikers or wearing some  other new updated sport equipment (rollerball,? Hockey some other sport I’m not thinking of Muggle Quidditch??)

This one probably just made me laugh but Natasha just threatened Cap with a Peanut Butter and jelly sandwich! How is that suppose to intimidate him… the sticky jelly?  I like her hair better in this. (wasn’t crazy about Black Widow with blonde hair.) It’s a nice compromise and just the right blend of the 2. Maybe this is a metaphor that she’s “getting the red out of her ledger”?

Hulk banner & Rocket travels to New Asgard?!?!  Gasps of shock float through the theater then laughter. I’m sure you need not know at what or is it who?

Tony gives Thor and Rocket new names, not sure which one made me laugh more… We’ve got quite a few pop culture references in this and there’s one part that they talk about Hot Tub Time Machine so Sebastian Stan (aka winter soldier) apparently exists in the MCU.

I think I know what those suits make me think of now… maybe armor for Painball! NOT for proper (super) heroes and certainly not with that much white)

Some dialog with Rocket calling Scott a Puppy (yeah Paul Rudd does seem puppy like!)

Honestly the movie is like an old school TV series finale where they reminisce one previous parts of the show.. only this they are not doing that and while we do see certain points, I don’t think we have any repeat performances from that time.

And thanks to Tony I will never NOT be able to look at Chris Evans ass ever again!  “Oh cap, that suit did NOTHING for your ass”

Scott “I consider that America’s ass” then Stark calls him Thumbilina  (yeah Ironman is really on point with the name slinging this time around I think.

Everyone picking on Thor in this because he screwed up.

“Thanks for the pep talk Pussycat” guess that was aimed at Rocket

Stan Lee isn’t the only Cameo in this. I recognized I’ll just say that junk Yard security guard and is that… from Talking Dead?!!?

2 Questions ~if one is in search of the soul stone, but that person goes alone do they not get some sort of chance to win it?

One more What if one ,if not both of those people have no soul?

Gee hawkeye do you love your Family or Nattie more? (Honestly before we found out he had a family.. I was so hoping they’d get some relationship)  and WTF Happened In Budapest?!!?!?  Will we get to find that out in the Black Widow Movie?

Ok I’m Teary Eyed after that. WTF is Nebula doing What? I think, Don’t ever trust tech. NO!!!

Oh NO!!! (tear ready at the rim…) Oh YEs! Cap to the rescue in a most AWESOME way &Cheers erupt through the theater.

Is Cap hearing voices?  Talk about a dramatic entrance!  WAKANDA FOREVER!~!

“What, you wanted more?”     “Avengers Assemble”

During the battle or is a battle… I’m not sure about that I swear I’m watching an American football game.

And its Hawkeye with the pass to Black Panther  while the Spider skitters along with Scarlet Witch on the Defense trying to rip Thanos apart. Oh what the… that’s not iron man…and we get some girl power. Spidey gets a ride via ‘meow meow’ (I miss Kat Dennings, they should have had her in part of this) Paltro to Valkyrie and Congrats to Peter being QB1!

Well talk about fashionably late, Captain Marvel finally shows up apparently after a hair appointment (not sure what I think of it…but then again the only reason I want to see that movie is for the cat!!)

(Chuckles) Thanos tried to headbutt someone but comically didn’t work. I’m getting antsy now.. WHERE THE Hockey Sticks is Bucky!!! Geez, can’t you give him some actual face time maybe a heroic moment!

Ooh Apparently someone has been getting tutored by Loki! We get a bit of Iron trickery.

Most usually want a happy ending but things don’t always roll that way.

NO MID or POST credit scenes but I heard that there is some sound at the end of the credits (however some theaters are trying to rush patrons out)

Over all I don’t think I was at all disappointed (aside from Bucky Facetime, but let’s hope the entire Bucky & Falcon series is up on Disney Plus when it launches November 12!! So I just need to pay for it for a month. I forget what I read the prices were, but I think per month was at least $6 and change a month or $70 (something?) for the year. I just wish these streaming sites would make a price for a day or week (like when you are staying over night or on vacation)

I’m just happy that I didn’t feel impending doom and gloom like I did leaving Infinity War. I think that took a few days to depart. Or it might have even put me in another depressive state. Either way it was nice the way they worked it an HOW they write these stories linking to each other and so on just hurts my brain thinking about it. Talk about a weight on one’s shoulders. I’d love to see the outline or notes if they had them for the overall Phase 1-3 movies.

So for Phase 4 and on I wonder if there’s an Avengers like gathering and who the big bad will be, or will it all just be individual movies from here out and maybe get Falcon and company to pop in here and there. (We know who will likely be in Guardians 3. So I’m happy with that. I really want Chris Hemsworth to milk Thor as long as possible! (and would like a do over for the first 2 Thor movies.)

Highlights and Thoughts

  • Hawkeye goes on the warpath against who he deems should have been snapped away instead of his family  (really would like an explanation of how the snap ‘decided’ what people stayed and turned to ash.)
  • What was the shield Tony gave to Steve? Was that his original one or a new one? If it WAS the original Vibranium one, then WTF is Thanos’ weapon made of? 
  • Oh there’s a Cap vs Cap fight that I swear reminds me of him vs Bucky in Winter Soldier.
  • And a cap vs cap I can do this all dahy…”yeah I know” mmm cap one sounded a bit sarcastic.
  • Not sure who said it but I’m guessing its in reference to Thor… Something about a “Hippy beard like Bee Gees or Mungo Jerry”
  • “No amount of money bought a 2nd of time” Howard Stark… but didn’t it take money to make it so the Avengers could go back and build what they did, not to mention whenever hank Pym made the Quantum machine) So is that really a good quote?
  • Ugh!! Wakanda should have only been opened to INVITATION only. Now it looks like New York city and maybe Tokyo or is it Hong Kong as one city.
  • Falcon Bucky & Scarlet Witch standing together but who is the kid there? Was that supposed to be Peter? I thought I saw him before that.
  • “Move it or Lose it Hair Bag”
  • Ol’ Cap got a life and we get to see that ‘late’ dance.

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Had to include just becauses it was freaking Cool

https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

The 10 Best Marvel Cinematic Universe Moments

FINALLY an answer to who that kid is I KNEW wasn’t Peter Parker

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